365 Days of Spirit-Filled Fruits Challenge-Day 342

Self-control over what comes out of your mouth is SUPER challenging for me. It is most especially difficult when in a stressful situation. The other day I actually prepared myself for the frustrations that would occur at work by focused praying and yet I found myself later that day in a surprise I need this now situation. So, I scrambled to get together a couple of spreadsheets that could be used for a test import meeting that was starting as I spoke. Really?! You couldn’t have thought of this in the morning so I could have some time to prepare them. So, off I went rushing to get these spreadsheets done and sent when in comes what we like to call the “pit bull” co-manager because she is on top of things to get them done. My frustration was coming out of my mouth but I explained that I just got the call that this was needed which she didn’t realize so she leaves me be for about another minute and comes back. I tell her I am working it and have almost got it ready and then in SO my temperament way I said, “I can’t magically pull these out of my butt”. Well, she thought it was funny, which is what I intended for it to be to get her to back off. Unfortunately, she goes into the other manager’s office where the meeting is going to take place and tells those that are in there. They all were laughing about it but the co-worker on speaker phone in our Texas office was offended by it. So, I got a talking to about my language. Ugh. I felt so wounded and defeated and honestly was feeling like God didn’t help me. So, I was cranky and depressed for the rest of the day. The good news is I got over it and had to realize that with my forgiveness from God I had to forgive myself. I ended up reading from The 15 Invaluable Laws of Growth by John Maxwell and was just awed by how God works. He gave me some wisdom on this whole self-control over my mouth thing and gave me what to do. Here is an expert on the Law of Consistency chapter:

You will never change your life until you change something you do daily. That means developing great habits. Discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishments, and that bridge must be crossed every day. Over time that daily crossing becomes a habit. And ultimately, people do not decide their future; they decide their habits and their habits decide their future. As author and speaker Brian Tracy says, “From the time you get up in the morning to the time you go to sleep at night, your habits largely control the words you say, the things you do, and the ways you react and respond.”

So, I thought to myself how can I make my responses to people become loving, gentle and kind even in the midst of impatience, frustration and stress? I already had memorized this scripture but realized it was something I had to use constantly for every action, words I say and responses and reactions I make. Scripture is the sword of the spirit. It can overcome my weakness in my self-control over my mouth but it will take patience and persistence. Growth doesn’t happen instantaneously which is where my down on God attitude came from the other day. God is patiently persisting in working on and refining me. So, I thank him for this wisdom and will work on using his word as my daily defense against the weakness within me to turn it into a strength that glorifies God.

Psalm 19:14 May the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be pleasing to you, O LORD, my rock and my redeemer.

365 Days of Spirit-Filled Fruits Challenge-Day 336

I have been pondering the word rely since Monday when I got through my day without calling on God for help. I resorted to doing it my way and I was frustrated, angry and even said something that offended someone. To make matters worse, I knew I was not being a very good example of Christian love and the fruits of the Spirit had turned sour. I was a mess and instead of taking my stress to God and dealing with it in godly ways I went home had a glass and a half of wine (that is a lot for me these days) and then proceeded to let go of self-control and ate too many chocolate almonds. I woke up the next morning feeling very sorry for my pathetic display and asked God for forgiveness and help on being better prepared to handle my day at work that is extremely challenging right now. That word “rely” popped in my head so I tried looking it up in the concordance of my bible but it wasn’t there so I did a search on line for scripture about relying on God and was led to what I needed. I gave me a good visual and for me a visual works so well. God led me to another visual too of a father walking with his daughter holding her hand and as they go down the path they encounter a big pile of sticks in the way so the daughter looks up to her father and asks what they should do. My pile of sticks is my current workplace and the challenge of dealing with another culture and a communication barrier in the middle of 5 butt-loads of work that keeps piling up. Prayerful preparation with my Daddy and the visual tools helped me get through my day with patience and gentleness and my self-control was focused on what would glorify God.  The visual brought me instant peace and a smile to my face every time. If you have encountered a pile of sticks in your path, look to our Daddy and let him help you decide the course you should take.

Jeremiah 17:5-9 Thus says the Lord: “Cursed is the man who trusts in man and makes flesh his strength, whose heart turns away from the Lord. He is like a shrub in the desert, and shall not see any good come. He shall dwell in the parched places of the wilderness, in an uninhabited salt land. Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, whose trust is the Lord. He is like a tree planted by water, that sends out its roots by the stream, and does not fear when heat comes, for its leaves remain green, and is not anxious in the year of drought, for it does not cease to bear fruit.

365 Days of Spirit-Filled Fruits Challege-Day 272

We watched a movie called “Killing Season” last evening with Robert DeNiro and John Travolta.  At first, I thought it was going to be another vengeance-themed movie but it ended up having some depth and a good message about forgiveness. The basis of the story is about an American soldier who during the Bosnian War shot execution-style, along with his squad, prisoners they had captured who had done horrible things to women, men and children. 20 years later, this soldier is now in the mountains living the life of a recluse, avoiding his family. The man he shot survived and came back to seek vengeance but what he really wanted was a confession from the soldier that shot him. In the end, the confession comes and a beautiful thing happens, there is forgiveness. The vengeful man returns to his life with a smile on his face and the soldier goes to meet the grandson he has not yet met. Bitterness and shame will put up a wall that will keep you from living the life God intended with love and peace. But with forgiveness, our bitterness or shame will be washed clean and we can go out with peace in our hearts and be able to love as God love’s us.

1 John 1:9  If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

365 Days of Spirit-Filled Fruits Challenge-Day 269

With all the courtroom drama, both fictional and non-fictional on television, it is easy to imagine a courtroom scene with God presiding as judge. You are sitting at the defense table and Satan is the prosecutor. Do you choose to defend yourself or do you choose Jesus to be your defense attorney? Jesus doesn’t even have to say a word. His Spirit will be inside of you and will shine light over all the dark places of your soul. With Jesus by your side and the Holy Spirit within, you will be able to approach the bench and God. God will look at you with a smile and say you are forgiven. Now, imagining the other scenario is more disturbing. So you choose to defend yourself, your pride gets in the way and Satan lays out all your sins in full detail out for God to see. Your sins will seal your fate and you will be lead away by the jailer to hell. It really comes down to one choice. Choose to not go it alone or choose to do it all by yourself. I hope you will choose Jesus and let his light cover up your sins so that you can live forever with Him in heaven.

Isaiah 3:13 The Lord takes his place in court; he rises to judge the people.

365 Days of Spirit-Filled Fruits Challenge-Day 261

It is rare to find yourself in total absolute darkness without even a tiny spot of light because of all the electronics in our homes. My daughter had a glow-in-the-dark sleep-over party for her 10^th birthday. We had to prepare the basement for the party. Total darkness took some effort. We had to turn off everything that we could, cover up anything we couldn’t turn off and black out the windows. We had to test the darkness a couple of times before we finally achieved absolute darkness. This kind of darkness truly is blinding. You cannot see anything but blackness and the longer you stay in this the more your fears are triggered to the point you just want to get out of it now. Just as we worked to get absolute darkness in our basement for the party, we have to put the effort into keeping the darkness out of our hearts. Forgiveness for others is one of those potential dark spots that can come into our hearts. Any un-forgiveness within us is like mold, it will only grow and cover more and more of our hearts. We have to clean out our hearts of this darkness so the Holy Spirit can be within us and transform us.

1John 2:11 But whoever hates his brother is in the darkness and walks around in the darkness; he does not know where he is going because the darkness has blinded him.

365 Days of Spirit-Filled Fruits Challenge-Day 148

Everyday is a new opportunity to be better, to live out a Christ-filled life. Ask God for forgiveness that night before you go to bed and get up in the morning washed clean, starting fresh and new. Habits are to tough create but with some motivation and reminders this would be a very good habit to get into.

Colossians 3:12 Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.

365 Days of Spirit-Filled Fruits Challenge-Day 130

The Holy Spirit has guided me to the topic of judging. In a negative office environment, with issues out of our control, it becomes very easy to judge individuals in the scheme of what’s happening. But the Lord is telling me to stop the judging and set the example of righteousness. I need to put on the rose-colored glasses of Christ each day that will help me view those that I work with in the way Christ viewed us. We are humans who make mistakes and we should forgive them. We are all uniquely designed by God and we must celebrate this uniqueness rather than put it down. And lastly, we all have a special place that God has designed for us that fits into his big plan for all of us. What is happening at my work or yours, in our homes and everywhere is being used by God for his big plan so we shouldn’t be judging but asking God to guide us in his special plan. So along with the armor of God, I will put on the rose-colored glasses of Jesus and view others without judgment but only with love.

James 4:11-12 Anyone who speaks against his brother or judges him speaks against the law and judges it. When you judge the law, you are not keeping it, but sitting in judgment on it. There is only one Lawgiver and Judge, the one who is able to save and destroy. But you—who are you to judge your neighbor?

365 Days of Spirit-Filled Fruits Challenge-Day 87

Forgiveness is one of the biggest battles we all face. Our anger and bitterness are the easy way but to walk in the light of Christ means we forgive as Christ forgave us. How can we show kindness to others if we have anger against them? Anger is a wall that you build up between you and that person just as a wall was built up when Adam and Eve committed that first sin. Forgiveness is the hammer that can break down that wall and Jesus is the one to do the hammering. He has hammered down the wall between us and God but we have to ask him to do the work for us. Don’t let your anger and bitterness reign in your heart, release it to Christ and have him take down the wall that will enable you to forgive and show the kindness and compassion that Jesus showed us.

Ephesians 4:31-32 Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.

365 Days of Spirit-Filled Fruits Challenge-Day 50

We had such a great time watching the Bronco game yesterday. It was a bummer that it didn’t end well for them. I just hate it when a game comes down to a field goal and you know there were mistakes made along the way that could have made the outcome different. But that is what life is all about. Making mistakes and hopefully growing from them. I woke up early this morning and got up to go to the bathroom and get a drink and my mind ended up thinking about stuff at work. I was thinking on this stuff for just a minute when I realized I was worrying about it. So, I began to analyze why I was worrying about it and figured out that it was because of my need for approval and to show that I can do it all. I wanted to make sure that what the boss, owner and my co-workers thought of me was that I am the best and most capable person to do this job. I realized I was being selfish and immediately started praying to God asking for forgiveness and thanking him for helping me see this for what it is so I can grow. From what I have learned about temperament theory so far, there are weaknesses in every temperament. God designed us this way so that we would have the need to reach out to him. These weaknesses in our temperament can be overcome with the power of the Holy Spirit within us. One of the weaknesses within my temperament is worry and/or fear. I have come along way with my fears in this past year and now it looks like the Lord is showing me my worries need to go to Him too. After praying to him about this worry over work and asking for forgiveness, my mind was at peace and I was able to get back to sleep. I have not overly thought of work since. I am certain the Broncos will be re-playing the game they just lost over and over again to analyze what they could have done better, what choices could have been better, what mistakes need to be worked on. They will work on these and hopefully come back a stronger and better team next season. Mistakes, sins and their outcome aren’t on my list of pleasures but the end result of these can be growth in our relationship with the Lord and in becoming more and more as he wants us to be. That in itself is joy. Knowing that God is working on us, molding us, helping us become more like Jesus is the joy in the midst of the mistake or sins we do.

Psalm 43:4 Then will I go to the altar of God, to God, my joy and delight.

365 Days of Spirit-Filled Fruits Challenge-Day 32

I read a book over the last couple days called Crossroads by William Paul Young the writer of the well-known book The Shack. The Shack was so enthralling a story that I knew I had to get and read this newest book. I wasn’t disappointed! I don’t want to give away the whole story but suffice it to say it takes you through a journey of one person who because of the suffering in his life built up walls and hated God. On the journey he learns about himself, God and love and tears down the walls with forgiveness and grace and learns to love like Jesus. If you love page-turner kinds of books, this is one you must read! It really demonstrates all the key points in learning to love: forgiveness, letting go, other-centered vs self-centered, acceptance, not on your own but with the help of Jesus and so on. I know I will be reading this book again and again. Praising God for his unfathomable love for us and the gift of this writer who wrote a story that shares with us the power of love.

John 15:13 Greater love has no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.

365 Days of Spirit-Filled Fruits Challenge-Day 16

Do you know someone that you have never or very rarely seen angry? It is possible but it seems we live with anger all around us. Anger at the government for not doing their job and taking more of our hard-earned money from us. Anger at schools for not educating our children in the best way possible. Anger at our employers for wanting more from us but not giving us anything in return. Anger at America for voting off the wrong singer on The Voice. Yes, it is everywhere and for everything. So how do we overcome all the anger around us and keep us from being angry too? Only the Holy Spirit can do the job but we have to ask for help everyday to be able to live a life of joy, peace and forgiveness; a life of praise, worship and prayer. The antidote for anger is thanksgiving. I think it is said best in one of my favorite scriptures:  Phillipians 4: 4-7 Always be joyful because you belong to the Lord. I will say it again. Be joyful. Let everyone know how gentle you are. The Lord is coming soon. Don’t worry about anything. Instead, tell God about everything. Ask and pray. Give thanks to him. Then God’s peace will wash over your hearts and your minds because you belong to Christ Jesus. God’s peace can never be completely understood.

365 Days of Spirit-Filled Fruits Challenge-Day 2

A key component to having the forgiveness we need is Jesus Christ. We can not do good things and love our way out of our sins. We cannot go straight to God with our sins. There is a large canyon that separates us from God. He is on one side and us with our sins on the other side. But because God loves us so much, he sent his only son Jesus to live among us and die for us. Our sins needed atonement, a sacrifice and Jesus was it. He was a man without sin, the son of God, our Savior and bridge across the canyon. Why did God give us this one and only way to Him? The only answer I have to that is to trust God and have faith in Jesus. Accept the unfathomable love that God demonstrated in Jesus. There is no greater love. Through this love we can seek the forgiveness we need so we can respond back with our love.

Lord, I am forever in awe of the love you have given to us through the gift of your son, Jesus. I believe that Jesus is your one and only son who came to live among us, died on the cross for our sins, rose from the dead and is seated by your side right this moment. Help me to live with faith and cross the bridge that Jesus has provided today and all the days to come. In your precious name, Amen.

1 John 4:9-11 In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only Son into the world, so that we might live through him. In this is love, not that we have loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.

This is a fatihbook page done a few years ago that shows the canyon between us and God and Jesus as the bridge.

365 Days of Spirit-Filled Fruit Challenge

Today begins a new year's goal of working with the Holy Spirit and being filled with His fruits each day. I am going to focus on one particular fruit for 6-week segments. They always say in trying to change yourself or break a habit or create a new one you need at least 14 days. Well, I always need a lot more than that if I want to make it a new thing that really sticks with me. I am just going in the order based on the scripture from Galations so we will be starting with “LOVE”. There are so many things to talk about when it comes to this subject but I am going to start us off with the topic of what blocks us from truly loving God and others. That would be SIN. I think one of the most challenging things is recognizing our sins for what they are. I found this list of 667 sins in the bible on-line at http://www.scribd.com/doc/14087682/667-Sins-in-the-Holy-Bible  I would suggest you read through these as a way to start that recognition process. It certainly opened my eyes. Remember Sin separates us from God. Though we have been saved by the grace of Jesus Christ, we must work at our relationship with God by asking for His forgiveness everyday and asking Him to help us forgive others. To love we must forgive first.

Let us pray this prayer everyday:  Father of all, because of your love, I am saved. I am sorry for my sins of this past day especially the sin of (name the sin). Please wash over your grace upon me and take away my sins. Make me clean and fresh for the new day before me. Help me to forgive as you have forgiven me. Guide me in taking away this blockage of sin that keeps me from loving you and others as you want me to. For with you all things are possible. Amen and Amen.

(**note** I will post all prayers on the new prayer tab for daily reference)

Jeremiah 5:25 says, "Your sins and iniquities prevent good things from happening to you."

365 Days of Praise Challenge-Day 359

We watched the movie Brave last night. It is well worth your time to watch especially if you are a mother or a daughter since the plot is about the relationship between the mother-queen and daughter-princess. The thing I love most about this movie is how it shows the conflict within a person when it comes to facing their sins. The princess ultimately faced what she did and asked for forgiveness. This conflict within a person came up in my reading from a Tim LaHaye book called The Spirit-filled Temperaments. He told of a woman who asked him to tell her the truth about what she was doing that was making her ultimately be depressed. He was hesitant about it but she pushed more and so he told her the flat out truth, it is because you are selfish. The sin of selfishness was making her thought patterns turn negatively and so she ends up depressed. This lady obviously was having conflict within herself and finally was brave enough to ask someone who was going to give it to her straight. The main point in both of these stories is that we have a choice but in making that choice we have to be brave. We have to be able to see the truth of ourselves so that we can go on and ask for forgiveness and be cleansed. Facing our sins for what they are is the first hurdle in restoring our relationship to God that was ripped apart in the Garden of Eden. It is like the symbol in the movie of the tapestry that the princess cut in two with a sword. One side was her and the other side was her parents. One side is us and the other side is God.  Jesus came and he can stitch the tapestry back together when we bravely face our sins and ask for forgiveness. Thank you Lord for giving us the motivation and bravery to face our sins each day and ask your forgiveness.

Romans 14:11-12 If we confess our sins to him, he is faithful and just to forgive us and to cleanse us from every wrong.

365 Days of Praise Challenge-Day 318

Our sermon yesterday was the beginning of our Stewardship Season. It is the time of year when the church focuses on giving. It can be a challenging topic considering the state of our economy but it is a part of our church and living as the body of Christ that we do need to be reminded of. Rather than focus on money, the sermon was about all the various ways we can be giving back based on our gifts. I was especially tickled by our pastor’s challenge to give for 365 days. Hmmm….. sounds familiar. The truth is that when we focus on one aspect of giving each day it can be a huge blessing to not only yourself but countless others. So, our challenge in the days ahead before commitment Sunday is to figure out what our challenge will focus on. What will I give each day for the next year? It could be just doing a kindness for someone everyday, an encouraging word shared everyday or forgiving others everyday. Take a look at your gifts and decide how you can be giving using your gifts everyday in the year to come.

Romans 12:6-8 We have different gifts, according to the grace given us. If a man’s gift is prophesying, let him use it in proportion to his faith. If it is serving, let him serve; if it is teaching, let him teach; if it is encouraging, let him encourage; if it s contributing to the needs of others, let him give generously; if it is leadership, let him govern diligently; if it is showing mercy let him do it cheerfully.

365 Days of Praise Challenge-Day 308

We play a lot of roles through out our lives. I have been pretty successful at most of them and am always willing and able to improve but I am so fired as the "tooth fairy". My nine-year-old daughter wiggled a tooth out last night before bed and though she knows that Mom is the tooth fairy she wanted me to keep playing that role. I was never very good at it. The first tooth I forgot to take the tooth and leave money so I had to come up with a story about the tooth fairy being super busy and she would probably come tonight. I had a heck of a time once getting a tooth under her pillow that I could not find. Thankfully, I managed to find it without waking her up. Last  night I told her I could just give her money in the morning but she gave me that "look". She wanted to go through all the motions of putting her tooth under her pillow and waking up to find her reward. Ugh. I forgot! I am so fired! She came marching up to me this morning holding out the baggie with the tooth. Thankfully, she was forgiving especially after I produced a dollar for her. We do our best as parents but we are not perfect. Praising the Lord for being the one thing in our lives that is constant, perfect and unending and praising the Lord for the forgiveness a child gives you.

Luke 23: 33-34 When they came to a place called the Skull, there they crucified him, along with the criminals – one on his right, the other on his left, Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.”

365 Days of Praise Challenge-Day 266

Yesterday I spoke with a co-worker who seemed to be in a bad mood. I got her to open up to me and share how she was not happy with another co-worker and how condescending she was to her. She tries to let it go, she's spoken to our office manager and my team lead about it with no results and seemed to be on the boiling point with the feelings she was having about it all. In the end of our conversation, she seemed to be in a better mood, smiling and ready to move on. I walked away and said I was glad our talking together helped get some of it off her chest. God wants us to be peacemakers and here I found myself with an opportunity to help bring some peace. In helping my friend with her feelings, I made myself feel good too. How do you love someone that you don't like or that creates stress in your life or that talks down to you? Forgiveness is the key. You have to be able to forgive what that person is or is doing or saying that creates those negative feelings in you. I have been working on that when it comes to the owner of the company I work for. And have even gone as far as praying for him. I have come some ways in overcoming my negative feelings towards him.  Would I be able to wrap my arms around him in love? No, not yet but like most things you must keep attempting to grow and progress. Do you have someone in your life that you can't find an ounce of love in you for? Take a look at forgiveness and start there.

Mark 11:25 And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses.”

365 Days of Praise Challenge-Day 251

I found myself last night tossing and turning with a song stuck in my head by Tenth Avenue North called Losing. Sometime in the early morning hours, with that song still going in my head and my head starting to hurt a little, I had a total flash of insight that came from God. I was very angry yesterday when I heard the news that I would have to be moving to another desk. It's not the moving part that is annoying; it's the fact that it will be to another in the same room. It will be a complete waste of my time and just make me further behind than I already am from being on vacation. It makes no sense to me but the owner has established assigned seating. I feel so micro-managed that it just hurts. I and all of my co-workers feel pretty much the same way about the new owner. We don't like him or what he is doing. It's created havoc, stress and makes us all feel disrespected and unappreciated. My feelings about this man are not good. Let's just leave it at that. However, my flash of insight last night as I sang the song in my head with these words:

Oh Father, give me grace to forgive them
Cause I feel like the one losin'

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rjSA62YQBY8
Thank you Lord for speaking to me through this song about my own situation and about my need for grace to forgive.

Matthew 18:21-22 Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times? “Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.”

365 Days of Praise Challenge-Day 186

I am so not the perfect mother and I am so thankful for forgiveness from God and my family. My idealist expectations bubble was burst yesterday with my frustrations of doing stuff as a family on my day off of work. My daughter wanted to play the Wii so after a lazy afternoon nap while watching the movie The Patriot, I was all ready to do some family stuff but not everyone was on board with that idea.  My attempt to get the game started without my husbands help ended up in a frustrated mess and pushed me to lose my self-control and get angry. In my anger, I told my daughter we weren't going to play but instead go outside and practice riding her bike. She was not kean on that idea since her last practice ride and her fall. She's also becoming aware of how it looks with a 9 year old riding a bike with a parent next to her and training wheels. I turned my anger into what I thought would be productiveness in getting her on her bike but it ended up being a disrespetful mother pushing her daughter to do something she wasn't ready to do. It broke my heart as I saw her go into the house and start crying. My bubble burst at that point in a big way. I saw what I had done and realized how wrong it was. My parenting has always been with a healthy respect for my kids. I have always thought respect needs to go both ways. I did not respect her fears and feelings at all. I went upstairs and hugged her with 'I am sorry's' for a while and than I asked her to come watch me ride my bike that I got for Christmas. In the end, it's probably a good lesson for my daughter to see her mother struggle with her own sins but to turn back and ask for forgiveness but I still wished it hadn't happened. Thank you Lord for your mercy, forgiveness and love.
Matthew 6: 12 Forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors.

365 Days of Praise Challenge-Day 153

It hurts and is humiliating even to write this but I am a sinner just like everyone. While in San Antonio, my mom and sister and I went out to a pub for drinks and dinner. I intended to stick with just the one beer I order especially after getting a headache the day before after having the margarita at Rita's on the Riverwalk. But a table of folks next to us had ordered this drink sampler thingy the pub had. It was probably less than a minute and we were ordering one for our table. I call this the downfall. This is where it went downhill. Having 6 different mixed drinks that were all pretty darn good was just the frosting on the cake. The cherry and whipped cream were added when the table next to us order a round of tequila for us. Oh no! We all went along with it except my sister who has had a very bad experience with tequila enough to make her never want to have it again. I ordered some food thankfully at this point but my mom ordered more tequila for us so we were pretty toasted. At this point a singing drunk man came over to our table and was on his knees singing very loud and obnoxiously. I had eaten most of my pasta dish that I wanted at this point and without really thinking took a bite of pasta and put it in the singing drunks mouth. Once wasn't enough, I did it again and at this point my mom whispered to me that the man was a pan-handler. I stopped and the guys at the table next to us escorted the singing drunk out of the restaurant. It hit me later on at about 4am in the morning when I woke up in bed what I had done. I cried to Jesus for forgiveness for being a drunk fool. I opened up an avenue for sin to come out in myself with drinking too much. I am not a drinker anymore so it doesn't take much. In any case, I spoke to my mom and sister about it and vowed never to drink like that again. My mom told me he wasn't a pan-handler but just some drunk guy in the bar but that still didn't excuse my own sin. Drunkeness leads to foolishness, period. Ephesians 5:18 Do not get drunk on wine, which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit.